Rain & my mind

Give me any rainy day and I will give you nothing in return. I do manage to get out of bed, and if I happen to be off from the day job, I will get a workout in first thing in the morning. But anything else – zippy. My chronic depression is kept in check, but even with reinforcement, it’s no match to a gray, soggy day. Rain is beautiful. Rain is a necessity of life. But it has tremendous control over my mind. Ask me to give a shit about something on a rainy day and I’ll give you none. Just leave me be – allow me to wallow in my own world. Ideally, every rainy day would be spent in bed with comfy pajamas and a good book (or maybe a really good movie). That is the level of my ambition on rainy days. Don’t ask me to think. Don’t ask me to be cheery. Not going to happen. Today is a rain-soaked day. And also, hubby and his uncle are installing drywall in the spare bedroom, so the continuous thunder of hammer against wall is today’s background soundtrack. I’m grateful – SO GRATEFUL – that the work is being done. But any form of my mind relaxing will need to wait until later this afternoon.

Additional work on two acrylic paintings was achieved yesterday. On one, I am having one helluva time with the water. I just can’t get it to look right. I’m currently obsessed with the notion of painting perfect waves, so I attempt the waves, they look awful, and then I paint over them. I’m on about layer five for this particular painting (see below).

If you look near the top rock on the right (yes, they’re actually supposed to be rocks – these also need to be redone) you’ll see where I hastily repainted layers today to cover the waves I did yesterday. There is a lot more to be done overall with this painting, but that water…. I think part of the problem is not setting my intention for the outcome. May sound goofy, but this does make a difference the majority of the time. I just jumped into this without really thinking about it and nothing was working. Even with my Mondays off from the day job (which are my art days) I do find myself rushing for no real reason at times. A large, separate part of the problem for sure. Will let this sit for the rest of the week and gather my mind around it. Hoping to have paint time this coming Sunday, so until then. She waits. 🙂

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